Thurman Merman?!?!

Tired of all those jaded, faded tv Christmas specials, all those cut-from-the-same-lame-mold Christmas movies, fellow seeker? Well, look ye no further, for you have found the film that is the virtual pure embodiment of the ultimate Christmas spirit - Bad Santa.

Poor Willie (a brilliant Billy Bob Thornton, at the top of his game, a la Sling Blade) is at the end of his sordid, twisted and drunken rope, barely able to cope with his once-a-year Christmas gig as S Claus. Enter salvation, in the form of overweight, parentless 12-year-old Thurman Merman, who instantly becomes fixated on the wasted Willie and, in the course of the film, teaches him the True Meaning of Christmas.

Of course, there's a lot of bad road that Willie must travel to reach redemption (in the form of what he refers to as the 3 Bs: Booze, Bull**** and. . .well, can't mention the third one here, folks, just use your vivid imaginations - hint: it has 3 syllables). But reach it he does, and you will not be sorry you have made this most poignant of journeys with him. (wiping away a tear.)